Friends

So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God

because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God. 

Romans 5:11  NLT

Friends are so special and so different.  You have friends who are in your life for one season and others who span most of your life.  Because I will be leaving my friends in Kent and moving to San Jose, I have been spending time with many of them.  Each one is so different and tugs at my heart strings in different ways. 

• One day this week I had dinner with one of my closest friends.  We haven't seen much of each other in about two years but when we get together, time doesn't matter.  It feels like we have been involved in each other's life regularly.
• One of my friends lived with me for five months while I was going through chemo.  Even while going to work, she cooked, cleaned, and did laundry for me.  Every morning this thoughtful friend fixed food for me to eat for breakfast, snacks, and lunch.  She met all of my needs.
• Another friend has walked with me through divorce and illness.  She is practical and has helped with paperwork, getting a small refrigerator upstairs during my chemo months, getting the garbage out on the correct day, and grocery shopping.  Practical things that needed to be done.
• One friend drove me to chemo almost every week and stayed with me during the three+ hours.  After surgery or emergencies, she would also sleep at the hospital when family members couldn't.  This organized friend made sure that I was where I needed to be...and on time.
• Others have helped with school needs, meals, visits, cards, flowers, and encouragement. 

Friends have been very, very important to me but they are limited by time, location, and the physical.  God is not limited.  He can and does fulfill all of these needs.  If I don't take time for Him, He is still present and is familiar when I do stop and focus on Him.  He gives me energy and focus to get the practical things in life accomplished...or He sends a friend or family member to help. 

As I depart on this journey, I will cling to Him while I grieve the distance from friends.  It will be another new experience with Him.

Another CT Scan

Tonight I am having a difficult time.  I had another CT Scan to see if the kidney cancer medication is containing the cancer, reducing it, or having no impact.  As usual, there is a wait time of two to three days before finding out the results.  Most of the time I give it to God and know that all will be fine.  The past few tests have had negative results and maybe that is why I am feeling this way:  kidney cancer had metastasized into my right lung, the cancer had spread to my left lung. 

Emotions are all over the place but it probably has many reasons, one being limbo and another moving away from the familiar.  Reality is this move is exciting with many perks.  Reality is that God has prepared me my whole life for this journey.  Reality is that I love watching where new journeys take me.  That being said, my emotions are still all over the place.

I will praise the Lord at all times.

I will constantly speak His praises.

      I will boast only in the Lord;

let all who are helpless take heart.

Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness;

let us exalt His name together.

I prayed to the Lord, and He answered me.

He freed me from all my fears.

Those who look to Him for help will be radiant with joy;

no shadow of shame will darken their faces.

In my desperation I prayed, and the Lord listened;

He saved me from all my troubles.

He surrounds and defends all who fear Him. 

Psalm 34:1 - 8  NLT

After reading Psalm 34, I went to bed and knew that the loving, all powerful Savior was with me, surrounding me, holding me.  That is peace in the midst of the storm. 

Taste and see that the Lord is good.

Oh, the joys of those who take refuge in Him!

One day the members of the heavenly court came to present themselves before the Lord, and the Accuser, Satan, came with them. “Where have you come from?” the Lord asked Satan.

Satan answered the Lord, “I have been patrolling the earth, watching everything that’s going on.”

Then the Lord asked Satan, “Have you noticed my servant Job? He is the finest man in all the earth. He is blameless—a man of complete integrity. He fears God and stays away from evil.”

Satan replied to the Lord, “Yes, but Job has good reason to fear God. You have always put a wall of protection around him and his home and his property. You have made him prosper in everything he does. Look how rich he is! But reach out and take away everything he has, and he will surely curse you to your face!”

“All right, you may test him,” the Lord said to Satan. “Do whatever you want with everything he possesses, but don’t harm him physically.” So Satan left the Lord’s presence.  Job 1:6 - 12 NLT

This is a comforting passage, showing us how the Lord is in control and events/circumstances "go through His hands".  There is so much more in these verses but all I am referring to is how the negative isn't coming from the Lord...and He can and does set limits on what is happening in our lives.  Nothing can happen to us without Him saying, "yes".

For me, I must remember this when there are things, like cancer metastasizing, that come my way.  This move to San Jose is one of those events that went through His hands and got His approval.  The friends and family that this impacts also have this assurance.  For those of us who know and love God, can grab onto the promises that He is good, loving, and will be with each one of us on this new journey.  This is not just my journey or adventure, but all of ours.  Our lives touch each other.  I'm looking forward to seeing what the loving, almighty God has in store for me...and for you.

His Blessings

...and we know that God causes everything

to work together for the good of those who love God

and are called according to His purpose for them.

Romans 8:28  NLT

In three weeks I will be moving 1600 miles south.  The Lord is blessing me in so many ways because He promises to be with me through everything.  He has been with me while I have learned about cancer and treatments.  He has been with me during surgeries.  He has been with me when I have reacted to medications.  He has been with me when I was too fatigued to teach.  He has been with me in the hospital.  And, He will be with me during this move.  I don't know how I can get everything done. I don't know where my energy will be coming.  I don't know...but He does.

...when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.

...endurance...let it grow...needing nothing...

If you need wisdom, ask...

God blesses those who patiently endure testing...they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love Him...

Whatever is good and perfect

comes down to us

from God our Father.

James 1:2 - 5, 12, 17  NLT

Some people might blame God but when we remember how much He loves us, we can trust what He is doing.  I have cancer and I have been asked to move 1600 miles out of my familiar, comfort zone.  What is He asking you to do?

Come and See

God is our refuge and strength,
   an ever-present help in trouble.

Come

and see

what the Lord has done...

Journaling has been a part of my life for decades.  That is one way that I process what is happening in my life.  It comes in handy for me when I need to review how faithful the Lord has been to me.  He has shown me His love in so many ways.  Even now, I can see that this next journey will be exciting.  It will definitely be a time of growth because of all that will be left behind - all the familiar.  But, I have learned that when there are major changes, the Lord is very present.  That always gives me hope to see what He will do. 

The LORD Almighty is with us;
   the God of Jacob is our fortress.

In HIS Hands

I waited patiently for the Lord to help me,

and He turned to me and heard my cry.

HE lifted me...
HE set my feet on solid ground

and steadied me as I walked along.

HE has given me a new song to sing,

a hymn of praise to our God.

Many will see what HE has done and be astounded.

They will put their trust in the Lord.

Yesterday, my wise brother and I were discussing my future health and its impact on their lives.  I was telling him that I feel guilty - bad - sad that if my health doesn't get any better, it will put a lot of pressure on them.  First Kevin reminded me (not his exact words as he can state things better than I can) that our loving God is in control of my health, my life, my situation, etc.  He's right there with me.  Then he told me something that was a new thought:  the Lord may take them - my brother and sister-in-law - on a new journey too.  Their journey is also in His hands.  Dah!!!  That gave me such peace.   

Oh, the joys of those who trust the LORD...

My only hope is in Your unfailing love and faithfulness.

Psalm 40:1 - 4, 11  NLT

The Adventure Continues

What a winter! The last time I blogged I was waiting for results about my lung. Since then, I have had the upper lobe of my right lung removed as the kidney cancer had metastasized. Then it spread to my other lung so we tried medicine to stop its growth. I had a stroke-like reaction to the meds and was in the hospital for six days. Went home and returned to the hospital a few days later with bladder, kidney, and blood infection.

Everyone was concerned because I live alone. The decision was made for me to move to San Jose, CA with my brother and sister-in-law. It is close to good medical doctors and to the sun. lol

Life is full of changes and this is huge for me. While trying to help others accept the move, I am processing what this will feel like to me. Thankfully, the one certainty is that the Lord is with me and will continue to be with me every step of this leg of my journey. There is no map or visible plan as far as my health is concerned. The Bible must be my source and trust in the Lord must be my strength. So, onward I go to San Jose, CA in one month.